learning to say “no” to good things

 

I’ve found that the shortest word to write, is the hardest word for me to say.When we normally here the word “no” we normally associate it with weak excuses and in many forms of rationalizations. Why is it so hard for me to say “no?!” Perhaps I have a fear of hurting people?!

You see, I’ve said “yes” on so many occasions when I shouldn’t have.


I have a tendency to mistake all my busyness with a coat of godliness. Committing myself to things, I shouldn’t really be handling at certain points and times in my life. Many of these things are very good things! Bible Study, Coordinating the Christmas Program, Teaching Vacation Bible School, etc… all of these things can be blessing and are not bad in and of themselves. Though, if not careful they can rip apart my family and cause un-needed stress. Sometimes instead of praying over opportunities and ministries, and talking with my husband before jumping onto the commitment wagon. It is these times my life becomes off balance, because I’ve simply taken on too many commitments. Self inflicting stress on my plate – leaving me feeling as though I was trying to keep petals from falling off a wilting rose, is simply impossible!

I’ve realized that some moments when I was choosing to say “yes” I was bringing un-needed stress to my life – simply because I wanted to please people, or because I just enjoy serving others. I hadn’t taken the moment to think of of what was going on, or even talk to my husband before saying “yes.”


Even when I had many opportunities to say “no” and I knew should have, I just couldn’t muster or utter the small two letter word “no.” Simply for the sake of being involved or being part of a ministry or a GOOD THING. Pride, applause? Maybe.
 
As women we handle an abundance of things! But, we can only handle so much for so long before something must give, or we are going to collapse and loose it all! Or simply snap.

Right now, I’m learning to pray, “Lord, please help me balance and prioritize everything!”  I’m learning to be careful not to commit to something simply because I’m trying to please people, or because I enjoy the praise of others. 

Bondservants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh, not with eye service, as men-pleasers, but in sincerity of heart, fearing God.  Colossians 3:22
 

The only thing I am required biblically to be doing right now is

…. to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed. Titus 2:4-5

 

 She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:26-27

 

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.  Matthew 6:33

Seek God first.

God must be our pedestal in order to balance everything else.
 
I’m learning to say “no” to good things. Stepping away from a few ministry opportunities at this time, along with a few other commitments that have not been bad, but are not appropriate ministries at this time in my life as a young wife and mom.
My babies are only young once, and I only get one shot at my marriage!

The Lord is showing me how to prioritize my life – once again! And that tending to my home and the precious souls in it ARE indeed a MINISTRY.

And right now my husband and children haven’t been getting enough of me. I’ve become irritable, I’ve notice I’ve frequently been snapping at my children, we rush from one place to the next bringing much un-needed stress, and It’s my responsibility as the keeper/manager of my home, to step up to the plate and say “no” to some good things, at this time and point in my life. I guess you could say…I’m practicing being more intentional in my homemaking. My family needs me, and I’ve purposed to give them, more of me.

 

Do you find it hard to say “no” to good things?
Trust the Lord to help you and simply lean fully on Him! Without Him life will be a chaotic, crazy mess – but with Him you will find balance and the ability to handle what He brings your way, or perhaps what He hasn’t yet intended for your season in life. Perhaps it’s a “not now.”

 

Learning to say “no” to good things will allow you to say yes to God’s best. What have you learned to say “no” to as of late, to better your life?

 

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