Waiting.
The one thing that stands strong and clear when it comes to the adoption process. Some days the waiting is almost unbearable. But the hard truth is, our patience is being sharpened because of the waiting. It’s strengthening our souls just one step further to do the next thing, because God has already been there. He perfects us through the waiting, through the tears, through the struggles. When the joy comes in the morning, we look up in awe and wonder of all the great things HE has done – and we rejoice!
When we flew into Beijing the other day, my momma heart was full of all kinds of emotions. We were going to China to get our baby girl, and somehow it just didn’t seem real. As we waited to actually have our daughter in our arms, we were being kept busy – capturing our daughters culture – even walking the Great Wall! As my husband and I took steps on the wall – we both explained how we never in our wildest dreams would have even imagined we’d be in China one day. Visiting China was never even on my bucket list, or my husbands. And adopting from there was not even possible, and really not even considered in my thoughts or my dreams. It wasn’t attainable and I mean, come on...it’s on the other side of the world!
GOD is BIGGER.
Bigger than our thoughts, bigger than our dreams, or our fears. And like I’ve said before – opening the box and letting God be God is absolutely AMAZING! My words can’t express the whole ramifications of this whole adoption process. It’s just impossible to express.
We flew from Beijing into Zhengzhou on March 29th. The emotions were high. We were so close! Just one day away from having our little girl in our arms.
Again – the feeling “I can’t believe this is even happening!” occurred over and over as the excitement levels grew. We were with 3 other families from our adoption agency. Knowing these families were also experiencing some of the very same emotions, made it easier to bond with – even without words. We all just knew. We had a great small support group, and encouraging one none the less!
As we rode the bus to the administrative office in Zhengzhou, on March 30th 2015 – it was the same kind of scary excitement you get when driving to the hospital while you are in labor. However this time, no pain – just an anxious feeling of how will my child react to us? Will she scream? Will she cling? Finally after about 30 minutes we arrived! As we walked up the long steps to the opened door of the building, I quickly could feel my legs shaking as the excitement was almost unbearable.
We walked into a very plain large room, the front doors were opened to bring in the breeze. I remember we were just standing in the corner, just thinking – it couldn’t be a more gorgeous day than today! The weather was absolutely beautiful! We were going to have our baby girl delivered to us soon!
As our small group of families were waiting for our children to arrive – a large group of families from other adoption agencies came piling in. The place became crowded and overly loud. Nervousness mixed with excitement was flowing through our veins. Our babies were suppose to arrive first as they only had an hour drive to come. But apparently, they were delayed. We watched families receive their children – one older boy {maybe about 8 or 9} came walking in. He spotted his parents immediately and waved and practically ran right over to them. I shed tears just watching him being so excited he FINALLY, had a family!
We also watched another child maybe 11 or 12 walk in, and start to scream and whimper the whole time he was there. Another child about 3 years of age also cried and whaled as his parents struggled to comfort him. At this point, my heart was overwhelmed with emotions. We were preparing for the worst and praying for the best!
I kept thinking the over stimulating noise was no place to greet our child for the first time. But, as we waited and waited for our daughter to arrive the larger group of families were slowly leaving the building with their new found children…it slowly became quieter and quieter with minimal noise. And then it happened!
The moment. The moment of watching from the large open doors…our daughter being pulled from a tan mini van and being carried up to the building, alongside her little orphanage buddy who’s family was in our group, and who also shares her birthday, year and all! As they came closer, to the door, I’m sure my heart skipped several beats. There was our daughter, much smaller than we were expecting, and oh so beautiful!
As our daughter was handed to me, she had a slight nervous whimper – but she quickly laid her head on my shoulder and cuddled right in. We had been praying for this. For her heart to feel safe with us. I just held her, spoke softly to her in a small mix of brief Mandarin and English words. My husband stood by taking pictures, and quietly stated “We’ve got a cuddlier!” After several moments, I handed her to my husband. We watched her quickly open up to us. She was ours. Forever!
Introducing our daughter:
We were informed that our daughters orphanage works hard to help prepare children for their new families. It was evident our daughter recognized us from her picture album we sent her. She of course was reserved, but she recognized us. These moments don’t always happen in adoption this way. Gotcha days look so different for each child and family.
We truly believe that God answered another prayer of ours. Peace in our daughters heart.
Stay tuned for her adoption “movie” and more posts. 🙂
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