“Every man needs his wife to be a cheerleader, his number one fan.” – Bob Lepine

{Photo Credit: Art.com}

I have on many occasions regretfully embarrassed my husband, or have said hurtful words, that did not encourage or build my husband up. {Shamefully both in private & in public.} God has showed me and is still showing me – how serious it is to respect and honor my husband.

Building my man up is a big deal that contributes to my husbands confidence, masculinity, pride and self-image and what he believes he can accomplish in life.

 Our husbands need our affirmation, or they will naturally look for it in other places.

We as wives need to be reminded to:

 Appreciate the differences

Ladies, we can’t deny it! God created men and women completely different from each other – yet we’re so compatible at the same time! {God’s design is amazing, isn’t it?!}

If I may boldly say…the world doesn’t revolve around us and our opinions aren’t always spot on either. Sometimes we as wives have a hard time building our husbands up or trusting them for the final decision simply because it might not be exactly what we were thinking, or the way we would do it ourselves.

Our husbands are the leaders of our marriages, and we are on this journey together with them. We must trust our husbands for the final decisions and must be careful not to be manipulative wives either. Our husbands are the leaders of our families and they will be held accountable to the Lord for their actions. 

 Be your husband’s cheerleader

I don’t know about you, but encouraging and building up my husband doesn’t always come naturally for imperfect ol’ me. But I’m encouraged that through Christ’s strength, it IS possible to be the wife God wants me to be, and it is possible to show my husband that I am most definitely his cheerleader and number one fan. The Lord gives us the strength we need!

Encourage your husband by your words

 “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” Ephesians 4:29
We are told to speak only words that build up. We can build up our husbands in the way we talk to them and the way we talk about them. Our words should give grace to those who hear. Be it friends, family members – don’t be a back biter!

 Build your husband up with your actions

“In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.”
1 Peter 3:1-2
Even though in this passage it talks about the unbelieving husbands – this very lesson can apply to those of us who have believing husbands as well. We don’t just show our husbands respect by the words we use – but by the way we say them, and the actions we use.
{Our eyes, our facial expressions, and any form of body language etc.…}

 Build your husband up with your thoughts

  “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.” Phil. 4:8 
Our thoughts should also show respect for our husbands.
I’m sure you can relate to the following – my husband calls and tells me he’s going to be late. Dinner is ready and we’ve been waiting for his arrival for some time already. I begin to think negatively – “he must not understand how hard it is to be home all day with the kids,” “his job seems to be more important than us.” {But, the fact is… these thoughts are not even remotely true!}

To show my husband respect, I must also be respectful in my thoughts!
We are to respect our husbands all the time – not just when we feel like it or when we feel that he deserves it. Remember, God loves us despite our faults and wrong doings. Can we not show the same for our husbands?!

“God’s will for every Christian wife is that her most important ministry be to her husband (Genesis 2:18). After a wife’s own personal relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, nothing else should have greater priority. Her husband should be the primary benefactor of his wife’s time and energy, not the recipient of what may be left over at the end of the day.” The Excellent Wife


A Challenge for You!

The book Creative Counterpart by Linda Dillow has some excellent questions for wives to answer about their own husbands. This weeks challenge is to answer these questions about your husband – and then find some time to share your answers with your husband. You’ll both be blessed! 

If you are unable to answer any of the questions perhaps it’s time you seek out the answers! Rolling on the floor laughing
  • Do you really know your husband?
  • What is the happiest thing that has ever happened to your husband?
  • What has been the hardest experience of his life?
  • What are his secret ambitions, his goals for life?
  • What are his deep fears?
  • What about you does he appreciate the most?
  • What traits of you would he like to see changed?
  • What man or men does he most admire?


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